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Expert discusses

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>>Helping the mood. Re-start - to talk about after breaking adaptation

The counseling centers Feng Chia University teacher Yang

Love, regardless of which ages people seem man talked about the issues, especially college students, secret love, the pursuit of love, love, romance, and so is not a strange term. In the university campus, the love story is no longer a taboo subject, and even love credits attend is encouraged; free and open atmosphere of love, however, is not a happy-ending guarantee, on the contrary, many people have experienced quarrels, conflicts, contradictions, skelter, romance and even break up, while in this process, which is always a mixture of the worth of taste, it is difficult to judge the simple right and wrong.

Love is a life-repair chain: we learn how to pursue love, how to business relations between the two, but rarely have the opportunity to learn how to properly say goodbye, how to let go. In recent years, the news media reported that a lot because of emotional problems and self-harm or wounding event, which is also no shortage of undergraduate and graduate students, and the endless stream of social events remind us, this does not know how to break up, will not say goodbye to society , we should learn how to leave on good, learning how to be able to re-starting again after a break up defeat.

If the romance is really one thing can not be avoided, it had better be the crisis into opportunity, to help refresh and start anew, to avoid future More tragedy and pain. Therefore, after breaking the mood adjustment, is also a very meaningful learning process. Regardless of the reason for the split is what, after breaking up, I always take some time to repair, at this time, you can: 

1. Allow yourself grief

Romance lost feeling sad is a normal emotional reaction, do not bother to deny and suppress it. Mood repair is a gradual process, leaving a sad time! You can own convention the the appropriate mood consolidation deadline, eager to return to normal daily routine, and sometimes are even more unable to reduce the negative impact of the lovelorn.

2. Affirmation of self-worth

Perhaps, after the break up, you have self-doubt, think they do not deserve to be loved, modest reflection is helpful, but if it is excessive contempt can cause mood after breaking adaptation difficulties. So, after breaking to learn to accept themselves and certainly self is very important, do not forget to keep it to yourself cheer, believe yourself still is worthy of love, and be loved.

3. Learning from the late romance

Honestly face the real you, give yourself a chance to learn from the defeat, and re-observe his own appearance in the love, is what led to the relationship fade? After breaking up as much as possible to avoid repeating previous adverse interaction patterns, discarding the invalid, inappropriate thoughts and behavior, or to actively learn from books or courses effective interpersonal skills, for example: develop affinity characteristics communication skills, and emotional expression. But do not therefore fall into remorse emotion yo!

4. To seek support system or professional assistance

Teachers may wish to find a friend or a trusted sad chat, sometimes a soul is also a healing medicine confided to others. If you do not have the appropriate people can hear what you say, or you do not have concerns, you can also seek the assistance of a professional, in order to increase their own strength through a rough period.

Love does not have certain rules to follow the same road of love, some people go easily, it was to go hard, in any case, every piece of love are meaningful, even if is to the lovelorn break up, if appropriate Helping the mood, there will bethe re-start of the forces, but also can bring their own growth. Are you ready to re-start it?


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